The
Church Of Lord Gruntmost
“Giveth
All That Ye Eat Unto Me” – Spoken by
Our Lord to Saint John the Cr*ptist
Introduction:
Our
Blessed Lord Gruntmost sends you His peace, the peace of regularity as
long as
you give to him what is his due. As
St.
John writes above about our Lord’s commandment:
“Giveth All That Ye Eat Unto Me”.
It is his first and foremost commandment.
And
yet in this wicked world there are sinners who would engage in the sin
of will
vomiting for their selfish and sinful ends.
Our Lord warns us against that in this scripture that St.
John also
records: “Do not be given to willful vomiting or bulimia for it is
wicked and
takes from me what is mine”.
Thus
with the clarity of these scriptures we the faithful have joined
together and
have formed the Church Of Gruntmost to spread His Good News to the
unbelievers
who are legion with the Adversary and the forces of darkness and
constipation.
Features
And Links:
The Holy Father’s Blog (written at irregular intervals by His Excellency from the Holy City and his basilica)
Link To The Church’s CafePress Store
Store Link
Disclaimer
To Those Who Are Offended And Contact Information
Federal
501 (C)(3) Statement
Link To Our Sister Faith: The Church Of The Divine Fermentation
Church Of The Divine Fermentation
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